Aladdin InuYasha Style
by Loracarol
Summary: What do you think? I've finally updated Yeah!
1. Prolouge

Loracarol: I do not Aladdin (that's owned by Disney.) I do not own InuYasha (That's owned be Rumiko Takahashi.) If you want to sue me, all I have right now is $0.27. Here's the cast list. Absolutely NO complaining! If you are written in as having to sing, than you have to sing. Got it? Songs are written entirely in _italics._ Only one word in _italics_ is just an emphasis on that word. I'll say it again, got it?

Everyone: Got it.

Loracarol: Good. Here's the List!

Aladdin/Al/Prince Ali- Miroku

Princess Jasmine- Sango

Genie- InuYasha

Grand Vizier Jafar- Naraku

Abu- Shippo

Iago- Kagura

The Sultan- Kagome's Grandfather

Rajah- Kirara

Kagome- Someone Played by Kagome that I'm putting in the story- JUST FOR THE HECK OF IT!

That's all that's really important folks!

Kagura: Why do I have to be a parrot?

Loracarol: Because I said so.

Shippo: Why do I have to act like a monkey?

Loracarol: Because I said so.

InuYasha: Why do I...

Everyone Else: Because she said so!

Loracarol: Okay, on with the show!


	2. A Diamond in the Rough

Loracarol: A random peddler person is singing a random song to nobody! Let's listen in, okay?

Random Peddler Person:

_Arabian nights_

_Like Arabian days_

_More often than not_

_Are hotter than hot_

_In a lot of good ways_

_Arabian nights_

_'Neath Arabian moons_

_A fool off his guard_

_Could fall and fall hard_

_Out there on the dunes._

Ah, Salaam and good evening to you worthy friend.

Please, please, come closer--There. Welcome to Agrabah. City of mystery, of enchantment, and the finest merchandise this side of the river Jordan, on sale today, come on down!

Heh, heh. Look at this! Yes! Combination hookah and coffee maker--also makes Julienne fries. Will not break (taps it on table), will not--(it falls apart)—it broke. Ooohhh! Look at this! Pulls out Tupperware) I have never seen one of these intact before. This is the famous Dead Sea Tupperware. Listen. (Pries it open, makes raspberry sound.) Ah, still good. Wait, don't go! I can see that you're only interested in the exceptionally rare. I think then, you would be most rewarded to consider...this. (The Random Peddler pulls the Magic Lamp out from his sleeve.) Do not be fooled by its commonplace appearance. Like so many things, it is not what is outside, but what is inside that counts. This is no ordinary lamp! It once changed the course of a young man's life. A young man who liked this lamp was more than what he seemed. A diamond in the rough. Perhaps you would like to hear the tale? (PEDDLER pours shiny sand from the lamp into his hand.) It begins on a dark night (PEDDLER sand into the sky, where it forms a starry nightscape.) , where a dark man waits, with a dark purpose.

Loracarol: Now, let's go find that man, shall we? Here he is. Naraku is just sitting on his horse with Kagura on his shoulder. Gazeem, (a random thief) comes riding up to the pair.

Naraku: You...are late.

Gazeem: A thousand apologies, O patient one.

Naraku: have it, then?

Gazeem: Had to slit a few throats to get it. (Pulls out half of the medallion. Naraku reaches out for it, but Gazeem yanks it back.) Ah, ah, ahhh! The treasure! (Kagura squawks as she flies by and grabs the medallion.) Ouch!

Naraku: Trust me, my pungent friend. You'll get what's coming to you.

Kagura: What's coming to you! Awk!

Loracarol: Naraku pulls out the second half of the medallion. He connects them, and the insect medallion begins to glow. Finally, it flies out of Naraku's hand, scaring the horses, and is off

towards the dunes.

Naraku: Quickly, follow the trail!

Loracarol: They all ride off, following the glowing speck of light, until

it reaches a large dune. It separates into two and the halves plunge into the dune. All that remains are two glowing points of light on the dune. But then the dune begins to rise up, transforming into a giant lion's head, with the glowing points serving as the eyes.

Naraku: At last, after all my years of searching, the cave of wonders!

Kagura: Awk! Cave of wonders!

Gazeem: By Kami-Sama!

Naraku: Now, remember! Bring me the lamp. The rest of the treasure is yours, but the lamp is mine!

Loracarol: Gazeem starts to approach the lion's mouth, which forms the

entrance to the cave. He chuckles as he goes.

Kagura: Awk, the lamp! Awk, the lamp!

Loracarol: Now that Kagura and Jafar are alone, Kagura opens up in normal English.

Kagura: Jeez, where'd ya dig this bozo up?

Naraku: Hush….

Loracarol: Gazeem reaches the cave, but is blown away by the roar of the cave's speaking.)

THE Cave: Who disturbs my slumber?

Gazeem: It is I, Gazeem, a humble thief.

THE Cave: Know this. Only one may enter here. One whose worth lies far within, a diamond in the rough.

Loracarol: Gazeem turns to Naraku with a questioning look.

Naraku: What are you waiting for? Go on!

Loracarol: Gazeem hesitates, then moves one foot inside the cave. With

great apprehension, he plants his foot down. Nothing happens.

Relieved, he begins his trek again. Then another roar comes.

He turns back, but the lion's mouth slams shut and the dune collapses back to normal. All that are left are Naraku, Kagura, and the two separated halves of the medallion.)

THE Cave: Seek thee out, the diamond in the rough.

Kagura: I can't believe it. I just don't believe it. We're never gonna get a hold of that stupid lamp! Just forget it. Look at this. Look at this. I'm so off that I'm molting! (She flies up to Naraku's shoulder.)

Naraku: Patience, Kagura. Patience. Gazeem was obviously less than worthy.

Kagura: (Extremely sarcastically) Oh, there's a big surprise. That's an incred--I think I'm gonna have a heart attack and die from that surprise! What're we gonna do? We got a big problem here,a big prob- (Naraku pinches her beak shut.)

Naraku: Yes, we do. Only one may enter. I must find this one, this...diamond in the rough.


	3. One Jump

Loracarol: Now we are at a rooftop, where Miroku rushes up to the edge, carrying a loaf of bread. He almost drops it over the edge.

Guard: Stop, thief! I'll have your hands for a trophy, street rat!

Miroku:(Looks back, then down, then at the bread.) All this for a loaf of bread?

Loracarol: Miroku jumps off the roof, landing on two ropes strung between buildings, with

drying clothes on them. He skies down them, collecting bits and pieces of clothing on him as he goes. Finally, he's nearing the end of the rope, at a window, when a woman reaches and slams the shutters closed. Miroku slams into the shutters and falls to the street, his fall being broken by numerous awnings and the pile of clothes around him. He pulls off the top layer of clothes and is about to enjoy his bread when...

Guard #1: There he is!

Guard #2: You won't get away so easy!

Miroku: You think that was easy?

Loracarol: He looks at three women, laughing at him.

Guard #2: You two, over that way, and you, with me. We'll find him.

Loracarol: Miroku pulls a sheet over him and wraps himself as a disguise. He rushes over to the women.

Miroku: Morning, ladies.

Woman #1: Getting into trouble a little early today, aren't

we Miroku?

Miroku: Trouble? No way. You're only in trouble if you get caught--

Loracarol: A hand grabs Miroku's shoulder and yanks him back. It's the

first guard! Mroku's disguise falls off.

Miroku: I'm in trouble!

Guard #1: ...and this time—

Loracarol: A screeching sound from Shippo, then the guard's turban is pulled down over his eyes. Shippo dances on the Guard's head, laughing.

Miroku: Perfect timing, Shippo!

Shippo: Hello!

Miroku: Come on, let's get outta here!

_Gotta keep...one jump ahead of the breadline_

_One swing ahead of the sword_

_I steal only what I can't afford_

_That's everything!_

Loracarol: Miroku battles a guard wielding a sword. He dodges a couple of swings, then pulls down the guard's pants. Shippo raspberries the guard, then dodges an attack. The guard swings at Miroku, but destroys a barrel of fish. As Miroku runs off, the guard pulls a fish over his lower body as a pair of pants.

Miroku: _One jump ahead of the lawmen_

_That's all, and that's no joke_

_These guys don't appreciate I'm broke!_

Loracarol: Miroku and Shippo scamper up a pile of barrels, then kick one down

on top of another guard.

Guards: (one at a time)_ Riffraff! Street rat! Scoundrel! Take that!_

Miroku: _Just a little snack, guys!_

Loracarol: Miroku campers to the top of a platform. The guards shake the

platform back and fro trying to knock him off.

Guards: _Rip him open, take it back guys!_

Miroku: _I can take a hint, gotta face the facts You're my only friend, Shippo!_

Loracarol: Miroku jumps off the platform to certain death, only to grab Shippo's

hands like an acrobat. The pair swing into a harem.

Woman: Who?

_Oh, it's sad Miroku's hit the bottom_

_He's become a one-man rise in crime_

Loracarol: Shippo finds a plate full of fruit and stuffs his mouth full like a

chipmunk.

Woman: _I'd blame parents, except he hasn't got 'em!_

Miroku: _Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat_

_Tell you all about it when I got the time!_

Loracarol: Miroku and Shippo exit. Cut to a random Muscleman flexing to a crowd. The guards go past. Miroku and Shippo are behind the Muscleman, matching his moves, until they make a mistake and are discovered.

Miroku: _One jump ahead of the slowpokes_

_One skip ahead of my doom_

_Next time gonna use a nom de plume._

_One jump ahead of the hit-men_

_One hit ahead of the flock_

_I think I'll take a stroll around the block._

Loracarol: A chase sequence, in which Miroku and Shippo, pursued by the guards, race through a flock of sheep, hurdle a man sleeping on a bed of nails of course one extremely large guard lands on him. Shippo disguises himself with jewels until a shopkeeper discovers him.

Crowd: _Stop, thief! Vandal! Outrage! Scandal!_

Miroku: _Let's not be too hasty_

Loracarol: Miroku is surrounded by guards in front of a door. The door opens and a large, ugly lady comes out.

Large Ugly Lady: _Still I think he's rather tasty_

Loracarol: Miroku tumbles away, then puts his arm around a guard, acting like they're all chums.

Miroku: _Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat_

_Otherwise we'd get along!_

Guards: WRONG!

Loracarol: They all jump into a pile and fight. When they stop, Miroku and

Shippo are gone. They are sneaking away in barrels. They run across a flaming pit, followed by guards who hop up and down, screaming in pain as they cross the rocks. Miroku and Shippo pass a Random Sword Swallower, then Shippo goes back, pulls the sword of the Sword Swallowers's mouth. Shippo advances on the guards, who retreat in fear.

Guard #1: He's got a sword!

Guard #2: You idiot--we've ALL got swords!

Loracarol: Shippo sets the sword down gently, then runs. Miroku and Shippo are

once again surrounded, with guards coming from left and right. He jumps up and climbs a robe trick being done on the street, the guards all crash into each other.

Miroku: _One jump ahead of the hoof beats!_

Crowd: Vandal!

Miroku: _One hop ahead of the hump!_

Crowd: Street rat!

Miroku: _One trick ahead of disaster_

Crowd: Scoundrel!

Miroku: _They're quick--but I'm much faster_

Crowd: Take that!

Loracarol: Miroku grabs a carpet and jumps out the window.

Miroku: _Here goes, better throw my hand in_

_Wish me happy landin'_

_All I gotta do is jump!_

Loracarol: The guards follow him out the window, but they go straight down to the street, and land in a pile with the sign "Crazy Hakim's Discount Fertilizer." Miroku uses the carpet as a parachute to land safely and out of danger. Miroku and Shippo high-five each other.


	4. RiffRaff

Loracarol: I DO NOT own InuYasha, or Aladdin.

InuYasha: You say that every time, don't you think that they would have gotten the hint by now?

Loracarol: Not if they are extremely stupid, (which you aren't,) but I have to do it anyway.

Sango: I've got a bone to pick with you! Why does it end up with Miroku and I getting married!

Miroku: Oh Sango, I am _sooooo_ hurt.

Loracarol: Miroku, shut it, Sango, you know you've A) always wanted to hear him sing, and B) wanted to see him without his shirt on.

Sango: (Trying to hide a blush.) No-not true!

Loracarol: Whatever, let's get on with the show!

P.S. Tomodachi means friend.

Miroku: And now, esteemed tomodachi, we feast! All right!

Loracarol: Miroku breaks the bread in two and gives half to Shippo, who begins to eat, but Miroku looks over and sees two young children through the garbage for food. The girl,( who looks remarkably like Rin) sees him, then drops her find and tries to hide. Miroku looks at them, then bread, then at Shippo.

Shippo: Uh-oh!

Loracarol: Shippo takes a big bite of his food, but Miroku gets up and walks over to the children. The girl pulls her brother back.

Miroku: Here, go on--take it.

Loracarol: The children giggle with delight. Shippo tries to swallow his bite, and then looks guilty. He walks over to the children and offers his bread to them. In delight, they pet him on the head.

Shippo: I am not a freaking dog (like InuYasha) that you can just pet whenever you want!

Loracarol: Shippo……..

InuYasha: Hey I resent that!

Kagome: Language!

Loracarol: That did not go as planned, let's try over.

The children giggle with delight. Shippo tries to swallow his bite, and then looks guilty. He walks over to the children and offers his bread to them. In delight, they pet him on the head.

Shippo: Ah, don't. Huh?

Loracarol: Shippo sees Miroku walking into the daylight, where there is a parade going on. Miroku peers over the shoulders of people. He sees Kuranosuke Takeda (see episode 78)riding on a horse.

Random Person #1: On his way to the palace, I suppose.

Random Person #2: Another suitor for the princess.

Loracarol: Miroku is startled as the two children come running out from the alley. The boy, (who looks curiously like Kohaku) runs out in front of Takeda-Sama's horse, startling it.

Kuranosuke Takeda: Out of my way, you filthy brat!

Loracarol: Takeda-Sama brings up his whip to attack the children, but Miroku jumps in front of them and catches the whip.

Miroku: Hey, if I were as rich as you, I could afford some manners

Kuranosuke Takeda: Oh--I teach you some manners!

Loracarol: Takeda-Sama kicks Miroku into a mud puddle. The crowd laughs at him.

Miroku: Look at that, Shippo. It's not every day you see a horse with two rear ends!

Loracarol: Takeda-Sama stops and turns back to Miroku.

Kuranosuke Takeda: You are a worthless street rat. You were born a street rat, you'll die a street rat, and only your fleas will mourn you.

Loracarol: Miroku rushes Takeda-Sama, but the doors to the castle slam shut in his face.

Miroku: I'm not worthless. And I don't have fleas. Come on, Shippo, let's go home.

Loracarol: Miroku makes the climb to his home with the view, then tucks in Shippo for the night.)

Miroku: _Riffraff, street rat._

_I don't buy that._

_If only they'd look closer_

_Would they see a poor boy? No siree._

_They'd find out, there's so much more to me._

Loracarol: He pulls back a curtain to reveal the beautiful palace.

Miroku: Someday, Shippo, things are gonna change. We'll be rich, live in a palace, and never have any problems at all.

There, that wasn't so bad, sorry I haven't updated in a while, end of the school year is coming, so I should be able to finish it relatively soon.


	5. A Princess Leaves A Palace

Here's a refresher on who's who:

Aladdin/Al/Prince Ali- Miroku

Princess Jasmine- Sango 

Genie- InuYasha

Grand Vizier Jafar- Naraku

Abu- Shippo

Iago- Kagura

The Sultan- Kagome's Grandfather KG/S

Rajah- Kirara

Kagome- Someone Played by Kagome that I'm putting in the story- JUST FOR THE HECK OF IT!

Now, I realize that I forgot to kind of describe the characters to you, so here goes nothing.

Miroku: Aladdin's paint and vest combo, minus the hat, and the while the paints are black, the vest is purple.

Shippo: He's a monkey, so he wears no paints but he does wear a red vest.

Sango: Jasmines outfit, but with Greek style sandals for shoes, and no tiara/crown thingy. Her clothes are deep blue, and she wears silver earrings, instead of gold.

Naraku: His baboon outfit.

Kagura: Is a bird, so no clothes.

KG/S: The sultan clothes from the movie.

All other people will have their clothing described as they appear.

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Loracarol: I am going to let Sesshy-Sama say the obligatory words at the beginning. (It's possible that this will be the only time he appears.)

Sesshy-Sama: My name is SESSHOMARU not SESSHY-SAMA!

Loracarol: Glares at Sesshy-Sama. It could be worse! I could call you (duh duh duh) FLUFFY-

SAMA! I hate typing your name. It's to long, now you have a choice. Sesshy-Sama, or Fluffy-Sama.

Sesshy-Sama: I'll take Sesshy-Sama, thank you.

Loracarol: Good, now say the disclaimers.

Sesshy-Sama: Sigh Loracarol does not own "InuYasha" that belongs to the wonderful Rumiko Takahashi. Nor does she own "Disney's Aladdin" as that belongs to- wait for it- Disney, or Prince Phil of Seyruun, who is from Slayers, which is owned by Hajime Kanzaka. She doesn't own anybody (including me, thank the Kami-Sama) and she is just playing with this idea for her own twisted, psychotic, CRAZY amusement. If you wish to sue her, she has $0.20, and that's it. Thank you for reading, blah, blah, blah. IT'S OVER! IT'S FINALLY OVER!

Loracarol: Glare 

Sesshy-Sama: Sweatdrops Anyway, on with the show! Er... Fanfic.

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Loracarol: In the Sultan's Palace, the next day, in the Sultans chamber. The door bursts open, and Kuranosuke Takeda storms in, missing the rear end of his pants.

Kuronosuke Takeda: I've never been so insulted!

Kagome's Grandfather/Sultan (KG/S): Oh, Kuronosuke Takeda, you're not leaving so soon, are you?

Kuronosuke Takeda: Good luck marrying her off!

KG/S: Oh, Sango! Sango! Sango!

Loracarol: The Sultan rushes off into the garden looking for his daughter. He finds her, but is interrupted by Kirara, Sango's pet two-tail demon kitty, who blocks him off. Kirara has a piece of Kuronosuke Takeda's undershorts in his mouth.The Sultan grabs the cloth and yanks it out of Kirara's mouth.

KG/S: Confound it, Kirara! So, this is why Kuronosuke Takeda stormed out!

Sango: Oh, Grandfa-

Loracaol: Glare 

Sango: Er... Father. Kirara was just playing with him, weren't you Kirara. I don't know why I have to call him 'Father' he is _Kagome's grandfather _after all.

Loracarol: You can have him for a father, or Prince Phil of Seyruun.

Sango: I think I'll take Kagome's Grandfather, thanks.

Loracarol: Good.

Loracarol: Kirara comes over and allows Sango to pet and hug him.

Sango: You were just playing with that overdressed, self-absorbed Kuronosuke Takeda, weren't you?

Loracarol: Sango cuddles with Kirara, enjoying the moment, until she looks up at her angry father.

Sango: Ahem.

KG/S: Dearest, you've got to stop rejecting every suitor that comes to call. The law says you...

KG/S & Sango: ...must be married to a prince.

Loracarol: They walk over to a dove cage.

KG/S: By your next birthday.

Sango: The law is wrong.

KG/S: You've only got three more days!

Sango: Father, I hate being forced into this.

Loracarol: She takes a dove out of the cage and pets it.

Sango: If I do marry, I want it to be for love.

KG/S: Sango, it's not only this law.

Loracarol: Sango hands KG/S the dove, and he puts it back in the cage.

KG/S: I'm not going to be around forever, and I just want to make sure you're taken care of, provided for.

Sango: Try to understand. I've never done a thing on my own.

Loracarol: Sango swirls her finger in the water of the pond, petting the fish.

Sango: I've never had any real friends.

Kirara: Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Sango: Except you, Kirara.

Loracarol: Satisfied, she (Kirara) goes back to sleep.

Sango: I've never even been outside the palace walls!

KG/S: But Sango, you're a princess.

Sango: Then maybe I don't want to be a princess. (She splashes the water.)

KG/S: Oooohhh! Kami-Sama forbid you should have any daughters!

Loracarol: Kirara wakes up and thinks for a second. Smart Cat, ain't she? Sango goes to the dove cage and yanks open the door. The birds fly off into freedom. She watches them go. By way of fanfiction magic we travel into KG/S's chambers.

KG/S: I don't know where she gets it from. Her mother wasn't nearly so picky. (A.N Otherwise why would she have married you?)

Loracarol: A shadow falls over him. He looks up startled and sees Naraku.

KG/S: Ooh, oh. Ah, Naraku--my most trusted advisor. I am in desperate need of your wisdom.

Naraku: (Uber sarcastically.) My life is but to serve you, my lord. (He bows.)

KG/S: My first question is: Why do you wear that babbon suit, it must get awfully hot in there.

Naraku: Sweatdrops The better to serve you with, my liege.

KG/S: Oh. Okay. Well, it's this suitor business. Sango refuses to choose a husband! I'm at my wit's-end.

Kagura: (In a mocking-parroty voice) Awk! Wit's-end.

KG/S: Oh, ha. Have a cracker, pretty Polly!

Loracarol: He pulls a cracker out from his pocket. Kagura looks terrified. Then KG/S stuffs it in

Kagura's mouth. Kagura grimaces as she tries to eat it. Naraku and KG/S both laugh.

Naraku: Your majesty certainly has a way with dumb animals. (Kagura glares at him, I would glare too, if called a dumb animal.) Now then, perhaps I can divine a solution to this thorny problem.

KG/S: If anyone can help, it's you.

Naraku: Ah, but it would require the use of the mystic Shikon Jewel.

KG/S: Uh, the Shikon Jewel? But it's been in the family for

years.

Naraku: It is necessary to find the princesssssssssssssss a suitor.

Loracarol: Naraku says the word 'princess' with the accent on the second syllable, "cess," so that it sounds like a snake hissing. He turns his staff with a cobra head towards the KG/S. The eyes of the staff begin to glow. The room darkens, Naraku's voice slows down and deepens. KG/S's eyes get a hypnotized look.

Naraku: Don't worry. Everything will be fine.

KG/S: Everything...will be...fine.

Naraku: The jewel.

KG/S: Here, Naraku. Whatever you need will be fine.

Loracarol: KG/S removes the Shikon Jewel from a necklace and hands it to Naraku. The room

returns to normal as Naraku pulls back the staff.)

Naraku: You are most gracious, my liege. Now run along and play with your little toys

KG/S: (Still hypnotized) Yes...that'll be...pretty good.

Loracarol: Naraku and Kagura exit. We follow them. When they're out of the room, the parrot spits out the cracker.

Naraku: I did it! I now have the Shikon Jewel! I can defeat that infernal half-demon finally! I shall rule the world! Mwa ha ha! Ha ha ha ! Ha ha! Ha! (Starts coughing and choking.)

Loracarol: You don't really need the jewel, remember? You need the lamp so that you get your "ultimate power."

Naraku: Oh yeah... How do I get that anyway? I mean you say it all the time, and I still haven't seen the end of the script yet and...

Loracarol: IT'S OKAY! You get your just reward. Now Kagura's line.

Kagura: _I know the end of the scri-ipt! I know the end of the scri-ipt!_

Loracarol: **_KAGURA!_**

Kagura: Fine, jeez, you are scary when you're angry. Anyway, her goes nothing! Ahem. I can't take it anymore! If I gotta choke down on one more of those moldy, disgusting crackers...bam! Wack! I'll give him my patented "Dance of the Dragons" vasectomy.

Naraku: Sounds... Painful. Is it?

Kagura: It can be. Would you like to be my first guinea-pi, I mean patient.

Naraku: It can be...? I don't like the sound of that.

Kagura: Well, you could always opt for "Kanna's Soul-Stealing Mirror of Anesthesia" Side-affects may include Kanna taking over your body, and possibly several people seeing you dance around in a tutu, and leotard...

Naraku: I think I won't risk it, though it does sound intr-...

Loracarol: **_FOR THE LOVE OF JUSTICE! SAY YOUR LINE ALREADY!_**

Kagura: Your line is next.

Loracarol: ...Oh yeah... **_THIS IS STILL YOUR FAULT!_**

Kagura: Yeah. Right.

Loracarol: (Choosing to ignore Kagura's imbisaliac comment. Imbisaliac meaning Imbisile-ish, says her line.)Naraku pulls a rope, which reveals a hidden entrance to his chambers. You know, it always seemed to me that Naraku was more feminine than masculine, I mean she... Er he has long hair, and gives birth to children. Long hair- that I can understand. A guy Giving birth the children! Not so much. I mean, what if, your whole life you have really been a girl using magic to look like a guy? Sorry for Rambling, but I had to point that out.

Naraku: I am not a girl! I am most definitely male.

Loracarol: Who says? Fem-boy. Anyway, why do you act like a girl, anyway?

Naraku: It all started when I got a pink yukata for my seventh birthday and everything went downhill from there. I had long hair, and not the right body shape for a young boy. Those coupled with the aforementioned pink yukata had me teased for so long... I can still remember the names... (He keeps talking, but we'll ignore it for now.)

Kagura: You _do_ know that this is _your_ fault, don't you?

Loracarol: Well, you _could_ have warned me. Well, I know what to do. Hey, Naraku! If you don't say your explitive deleted because this story is supposed to be rated low line soon, By the power of justice, and fireballs and fanfiction-randomness invested in me I will make you dance ballet in a leotard and tutu- as an actual woman- over the landscapes of Japan especially infront of InuYasha, and Co. so help you God.

Naraku: I do. Wait. What!

Loracarol: Just do it.

Naraku: Yes Ma'am! Okay, here goes nothing! Calm yourself, Kagura.

Kagura: Then I'd grab him around the head. Whack! Whack!

Naraku: Soon, I will be sultan, not that addlepated twit.

Kagura: And then I stuff the crackers down his throat! Ha ha!

Loracarol: The pair pass through a door and slam it shut. Magically we go ahead in time a couple of hours, and end up in the garden at night. A shadowy figure walks through. We see it is Sango in a long cape that is supposed to be a disguise. She reaches the palace wall, then begins to climb it. She is tugged from behind by Kirara.

Sango: Oh, I'm sorry, Kirara. But I can't stay here and have my life lived for me. I'll miss you.

Loracarol: Sango begins to climb again, and is helped up by Kirara, who begins to whine and whimper.

Sango: Good bye!

Loracarol: And Sango disappears over the wall.

Loracarol: Not to bad, I hope. Thank you everyone whose reviewed! I will be updating with greater frequency now! Thank you again!

If you happen to like Naraku, and don't like me teasing him, then all I have to say to you is... **_DON'T READ THIS STORY!_** I don't really like him, so I will be making fun of him at every possible opportune moment


	6. The first meeting

Loracarol: Hiya peeps! Welcome to InuYasha's version of Aladdin! As I am bored out of my tiny little mind, I have decided to let my best friend "Eri-Chan" do the credits. Eri-Chan is cool, and has $$ kicking Ninja Skilz. Seriously.

Eri-Chan: InuYasha needs to die.

Loracarol: I know that you think that Eri-Chan, but that's not the poin-

Eri-Chan: I want to keep him as my slave for five years, than kill him. Then I will cut off his ears and keep him as a trophy. Than with InuYasha out of the way, Shippo will take over, and **rule the world! **

Loracarol: That's nice. Please finish what I asked you to say. Please?

Eri-Chan: Okay. Loracarol doesn't own InuYasha, which belongs to Rumiko Takahashi, and Disney's Aladdin belongs to Disney. This fan-thingy is the only belongs to Loracarol, and if you sue her, I will use my Ninja Star to pick the lock, and steal your car.

Loracarol: Huh?

Eri-Chan: Or get Loracarol to have me kill you in her next story.

Loracarol: Thank you Eri-Chan.

Eri-Chan: You're welcome.

Loracarol: By the way, The Female Sesshoumaru, (You've changed your name!), I am putting you in this part, and the singing part as you requested, if the part you have is offensive, please tell me, and I'll fix it, I promise.

Loracarol: Now who's who in the land of this fanfiction:

Aladdin/Al/Prince Ali- Miroku

Princess Jasmine- Sango

Genie- InuYasha

Grand Vizier Jafar- Naraku

Abu- Shippo

Iago- Kagura

The Sultan- Kagome's Grandfather (KG/S)

Rajah- Kirara

Kagome- Someone Played by Kagome that I'm putting in the story- JUST FOR THE HECK OF IT! Extra points if you can guess who! I might even draw you a picture of whose who… But you have to guess before I tell you.

On with the sh-fanfiction.

Loracarol: Miroku and Shippo are on the roof of a fruit stand. What are they doing there? You'll see.

Miroku: Okay, Shippo. Go!

Loracarol: Shippo dips over the edge and looks at the owner of the fruit stand.

Lady Sesshomaru: (To passing crowd.) Try this, your taste buds will dance and sing!

Loracarol: Shippo grabs a melon and hangs there, distracting his attention.

Lady Sesshomaru: Hey, get your paws off that!

Shippo: Blah blah blah!

Lady Sesshomaru: Why, you! Get away from here, you filthy ape!

Loracarol: Because that's how the story goes, Lady Sesshomaru grabs the melon away from Shippo, but behind him Miroku dips down and snatches another melon from the stand.

Shippo: Bye bye!

Loracarol: Shippo zings back up out of the way of Lady Sesshomaru, who takes the melon to the front, where she places it on top of a stack.

Miroku: Nice goin' Shippo. Breakfast is served.

Loracarol: Miroku and Shippo go up onto a roof to break open the melon and eat it. Here we meet Sango walking through the street, looking at all the beautiful, (and some times wrong,) things on display.

Jakken: Pretty lady, buy a pot. No finer pot in brass or silver. (Oh what a disgrace that I should put in this as a shopkeeper instead of helping my wonderful Lord Sesshomaru.)

Sesshomaru: (Mumbling) Sugar dates, sugar dates and figs. Sugar dates and pistachios.

Loracarol: Do not mumble "Lord Sesshomaru!" Or I'll take something that is very, _very_ important to your Sesshomaru and Male-ness…

Sesshomaru: You wouldn't…

Loracarol: Yes. I would.

Sesshomaru: Seriously? Why am I Lord Sesshomaru here anyway, I thought that I only had to do a disclaimer, and that was it.

Loracarol: I changed my mind. Now say your line, or I will take it…

Sesshomaru: You wouldn't dare take my-

X

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-fluffy??!! (A.N. If you thought I was going to say something else, you have a sick mind.) Anyway, your line…. And put some energy into it this time!

Sesshomaru: (With a fake smile) Sugar dates, sugar dates and figs! Sugar dates and pistachios!

Loracarol: Perfect.

Inu no Taisho: Would the lady like a necklace? A pretty necklace for a pretty lady!

Sesshomaru: I thought he was dead….

Inu no Taisho: Yeah, well I got bored, so… I quit.

Sesshomaru: You can quit being dead…?

Loracarol: No, but I figured the plot would have more of a "homey touch" if you were altogether as a family.

Inu no Taisho: As a family… You don't mean….

Izayoi: Mean what?

SessMom: Yes, husband _dearest_ meaning what?

Sesshomaru & Inu no Taisho: Oh crap.

Sango: You do realize that I am still _standing right here_. Right?

Loracarol: Moving on….

Sesshomaru/Inu no Taisho/SessMom/Izayoi/Jakken/Sango: You do realize that you started it right…

Loracarol: Anyway… Sango is charmed by the attention of all the shopkeepers, but is startled by a fish thrust into her face.

Hojo: Fresh fish! We catch 'em, you buy 'em! Besides that fish are full of healthy natural vitamins an-

Sango: I don't think so.

Loracarol: She backs away, but bumps into a fire eater, who is startled into swallowing his fire. Sango: Oh, excuse me.

Loracarol: He gulps, than belches fire from his mouth. Sango, being the princess that she is, is disgusted. He is pleased and taps his stomach Miroku sees her, because, even in her peasant outfit she is …. Hot. A strange look comes over his face.)

Sango: I'm really very sorry.

Miroku: (He's obviously ogling her.) Wow!

Loracarol: She pulls the hood of her cloak over her head. Shippo sees Miroku and jumps up on his shoulder, waving his hand in front of Miroku's face.

Shippo: Um, Miroku, ogling equals not a good idea. Remember the last time you did that? The woman was married! And the time before that when it was actually a cross dresser, and the time before that, and the time before that, and the time before that, and the time before that, and the time before that….

Loracarol: Sango stops at the fruit stand and sees a young homeless boy reaching for a piece of fruit. She picks one up and gives it to him.

Sango: Oh, you must be hungry. Here you go.

Loracarol: The boy than runs off.)

Menomaru: You'd better be able to pay for that.

Sango: Pay?

Menomaru: No one steals from my cart!

Sango: Oh, I'm sorry sir. I don't have any money.

Menomaru: Thief!

Sango: Tyrant!

Menomaru: Tom-boy!

Sango: Girly man!

Menomaru: That was hitting it a little below the belt, wasn't it?

Loracarol: Your real lines please?

Sango: Fine. Please, if you let me go to the palace, I can get some from the Sultan. (Whispering: Girly man.)

Menomaru: Do you know what the penalty is for stealing? (Whispering: Tom-boy.)

Sango: Since when is being a tomboy a bad thing?

Menomaru: Since now!

Loracarol: He takes her hand and pins it down on the table, intending to chop it off.

Sango: I can still fight with one hand, it will be hard-

Loracarol: Glare

Sango: I mean: No, no please!

Loracarol: The sword drops, but his hand is stopped by our handsome hero Miroku.


	7. On the Town

Loracarol: I know that I said that I was on hiatus, but I changed my mind. What did you think of me adding Inu no Taisho? I had fun with that.

Inu no Taisho: I didn't…

Loracarol: Anyway, here's the cast

Aladdin/Al/Prince Ali- Miroku

Princess Jasmine- Sango

Genie- InuYasha

Grand Vizier Jafar- Naraku

Abu- Shippo

Iago- Kagura

The Sultan- Kagome's Grandfather

Rajah- Kirara

Kagome- Someone Played by Kagome that I'm putting in the story- JUST FOR THE HECK OF IT!

On with the tale!

Inu no Taisho: Working with my wives was rough.

Loracarol: Oh- poor Inu Papa! Hey- What are you looking for?

Inu no Taisho: (Searching very hard,) Hey- Where's the sake gone?

Izayoi: We decided that it wasn't good for you, so we dumped it out.

SessMom: Youd do better with us when you're not drunk anyway.

Inu no Taisho: But- but why's the sake gone?

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Miroku: Thank you kind sir. I'm so glad you've found her. I've been looking all over for you.

Sango: (whispering) What are you doing?

Miroku: (whispering back) Just play along.

Menomaru: You know this girl?

Miroku: …You're really asking _me_ that…

Loracarol: A-hem.

Miroku: I mean…. Sadly, yes. She is- She is- She is my sister. She's a little crazy.

Loracarol: Miroku circles his finger around his ear. Sango is shocked. Menomaru grabs him by the vest.

Menomaru: She said she knows the Sultan!

Miroku: She thinks this is the Sultan.

Loracarol: Miroku points to Shippo. Shippo is picking a pocket. He hears this, and then straightens up. Sango decides to play along, and kneels and bows to Shippo.

Sango: Oh, wise Sultan. How may I serve you?

Miroku: Tragic, isn't it?

Loracarol: Miroku leans forward, picking up another apple from the cart with his foot.

Miroku: But, no harm done. Now come along sis. Time to see the doctor.

Loracarol: Sango turns and looks at a nearby camel. He's bored. It's a warm day, and he has to stay outside doing nothing. His name is Bob.

Sango: (To Bob.) Oh, hello doctor. How are you?

Bob: (Thinking) I need a new job. I'm out of here.

Loracarol: Bob runs away, and ends up in Egypt, where a tribe of nomads captures him. He is later sold to a British man, and Bob himself carries a young lady named Evy, and helps her win a bet with some _Americans_. But that's a different story, for a different time.

Miroku: No, no, no. Not that one. Come on, Sultan.

Loracarol: Shippo bows to the crowd and everything he's stolen from the cart falls out.

Menomaru: Huh? What is it?

Loracarol: Shippo picks up what he can carry, and the trio run off.

Menomaru: Come back here, you little thieves!

Loracarol: Now we "magically" go to Naraku's lab. Kagura is running on a gear in a bizarre contraption. At the top of the contraption is a storm brewing.

Kagura: (huffing and puffing) With all due respect, your girly-ness, couldn't we just wait for a real storm?

Naraku: Save your breath, Kagura. Faster!

Loracarol: Naraku places the Shikon Jewel in the contraption.

Kagura: Okay, whatever, o mighty evil one.

Loracarol: Kagura runs faster. A lightning bolt streaks through the jewel, passing into an hourglass below. The sands begin to swirl.

Naraku: Ah, sands of time--reveal to me the one who can enter the cave.

Loracarol: The sand in top forms Miroku climbing up a ladder, followed by Sango who is covered in her cloak.

Naraku: Yes, yes! There he is. My diamond in the rough!

Kagura: That's him?!?! That's the clown we've been waitin' for? Well… He's not _that_ bad looking….

Loracarol: Kagura loses his footing and is sucked the gears. Poor Kagura.

Naraku: Let's have the guards extend him an invitation to the palace, shall we?

Loracarol: Kagura goes flying past and slams into the wall upside down. Once again: Poor Kagura.

Kagura: Swell.

Loracarol: Naraku laughs hideously, and the camera zooms in on the sandstorm with in it. Dissolve into the real Aladdin.

Miroku: Almost there.

Loracarol: Sango climbs over the top, but trips and falls into Miroku's arms.

Miroku: Ni-ice.

Loracarol: Sango stands up.

Sango: I want to thank you for stopping that girly-man.

Miroku: Thank you hot stuff. Would you bear my child?

Loracarol: Miroku… Me and Sango both slap him.

Miroku: Uh, forget it. (He grabs a pole.) So, uh, this is your first time in the marketplace, huh?

Loracarol: Miroku pole vaults to the next building, leaving Sango behind.

Sango: Is it that obvious?

Miroku: Well, you do kind of stand out.  
Loracarol: He stares at her, undressing her with his eyes. She stares back, not even needing to undress him mentally because he doesn't have a proper shirt on. But he realizes what he is doing, and stops because he doesn't want to get slapped again.

Miroku: I mean, uh, you don't seem to know how dangerous the city can be.

Loracarol: He lays a plank between the buildings for her to walk over, but as he is leaned down, she vaults over his head, managing to do a flip before landing. She tosses the pole to him. Both Miroku and Shippo's eyes bulge.

Sango: I'm a fast learner.

Miroku: Right. C'mon, this way.

Loracarol: They go inside the roof of a building, dodging planks and beams as they go.) Whoa. Miroku: Watch your head there. Be careful.

Sango: Is this where you live?

Miroku: Yep. Just me and Shippo, we come and go as we please. Though it could use a woman's touch….

Sango: I think I'll ignore that last part, though you do have a nice place.

Miroku: Well, it's not much.

Loracarol: Miroku pulls back the curtain and the palace.

Miroku: But it's got a great view. Palace looks pretty amazing, huh? Bet you that they have some really hot chicks there too….

Sango: Smacking him Oh, it's wonderful.

Miroku: I wonder what it would be like to live there, to have servants and valets... Woman…

Sango: Oh, sure, people who tell you where to go and how to dress.

Miroku: It's better than here. Always scraping for food ducking the guards.

Sango: You're not free to make your own choices.

Miroku: Sometimes you feel so--

Sango: You're just--

Miroku & Sango: --trapped.

Loracarol: They look at each other, realizing that they're perfect for one another. But Miroku then realizes where he is, and breaks the look. He takes the apple out of Shippo's hand and rolls it down his arm into the hand of Sango.

Miroku: So, where're you from?

Sango: What does it matter? I ran away, and I am not going back.

Miroku: Really?

Loracarol: Miroku takes a bite from the apple in his hand, then hands it to Shippo, who has a disgusted look on his face.

Shippo: Hey!

Loracarol: Miroku walks over and sits next to Sango.

Sango: My father's forcing me to get married.

Miroku: That's--that's awful.

Loracarol: Shippo appears from behind the princess and tries to steal the apple.

Miroku: Shippo!

Loracarol: Shippo races up to a higher point, cursing as he goes.

Sango: What?

Miroku: Shippo says that--uh--that's not fair.

Shippo: What?

Sango: Oh did he?

Miroku: Yeah, of course.

Sango: And does Shippo have anything else to say?

Miroku: Well, uh, he wishes there was something he could do to help.

Shippo: Oh, boy!

Sango: Hmm, tell him that's very sweet.

Loracarol: Miroku and Sango have been getting closer and closer, until Miroku leans in to kiss her. He is interrupted, however, by the Random Guards© who have found them.

Random Guard #1©: Here you are!

Miroku & Sango: They've found me!

Loracarol: They turn to each other and then:

Sango and Miroku: (To each other) They're after you?

Sango: My father must have sent them--

Miroku: Do you trust me?

Sango: What?

Miroku: Do you trust me?

Loracarol: Miroku holds his hand

Sango: Do I trust _you?_ You're perverted, an-

Loracarol: SANGO!!!!

Sango: Yes. (She takes his hand.)

Miroku: Then jump!

Loracarol: Miroku and Sango both jump off the roof, fall and land in a pile of salt. They to get away, but the exit is blocked by a guard whom I've decided to name: Bob for no real reason, other then I think it's funny.

Bob: We just keep running into each other, don't we, street rat?

Loracarol: Shippo pulls down Bob's turban over his eyes, but more guards are here and block the exit. Bob pulls Shippo off his head and throws him in a vase. Three other GUARDS© grab Miroku

Bob: It's the dungeon for you, boy.

Miroku: Hey, get off of me!

Sango: Let go of him.

Bob: Look what we have here, men--a street mouse.

Loracarol: Bob throws her down. Sango stands up and pulls off the hood of her cloak.

Sango: Unhand him, by order of the princess.

Loracarol: The GUARDS© suddenly stop and bow, forcing Miroku to bow as well.

Bob: Princess Sango!?

Miroku: The princess?

Shippo: (peeking out from the vase) The princess?

Bob: What are you doing outside the palace? And with this street rat?

Sango: That's not your concern. Do as I command, and release him!

Bob: Well, I would, princess, but my orders come from Naraku. You'll have to take it up with him.

Loracarol: The GUARDS© drag Miroku out, bowing as they go.

Sango: (getting a very pissed-off look) Believe me, I will.

End Chapter

Kagome: Where did Shippo learn that horrible language?

InuYasha: (Whistling innocently)

Kagome: InuYasha!

InuYasha: I think he learned it from every time you started cursing about your home-work.

Kagome: Wha-

InuYasha: Or maybe from Sango cursing at Miroku when she caught him spying on her in the hot springs,

Kagome: No wa-

InuYasha: Or maybe from Kaede when she tripped…

Kagome: … She curses.

InuYasha: Yep.

Kagome: Weird.

InuYasha: Yep.

Loracarol: If you can figure out what I mean with Bob running away, and ending up in Egypt, where a tribe of nomads capture him, and being sold to some British people, then I'll give you a cookie!

Kagome: Ooh! I know! I know!

Loracarol: Okay Kagome, if no one guesses what I'm talking about in two chapters, then you can answer, okay?

Kagome: Okay.

Loracarol: I just realized that I named the guard **_and_** the camel Bob…

I wonder if there is a deep psychological connection. Maybe I'm remembering a camp counselor named Bob? Maybe I just think that it's a funny name! (No offence to all those out there named Bob, of course,) Maybe I just named them both Bob because I could! I have absolutely no clue! Oh well, see ya!


	8. In the Cave of Wonders

Loracarol: Guten tag everyone!

Inuyasha: What's with the German…?

Kagome: Inuyasha, how did you know it was German?

Inuyasha: …

Kagome: …

Loracarol: …?

The Cricket from Mulan: Cri-KEE Cri-KEE

Miroku: I think it has to do with this book he "borrowed" from your backpack.

Kagome: You mean it was _you_ that took my book?

Inuyasha: I thought you promised never to tell anyone Miroku!

Kagome: Did you actually understand any of it?

InuYasha: …Yes…

Kagome: Will you help me with my homework then?

Inuyasha: …Yes…

Kagome: Good. I won't "sit" you.

InuYasha: Danke.

Kagome: Good,

Loracarol: …What just happened???… Anyway, I think you should all know the cast by now, but here it is anyway;

Aladdin/Al/Prince Ali- Miroku

Princess Jasmine- Sango

Genie- InuYasha

Grand Vizier Jafar- Naraku

Abu- Shippo

Iago- Kagura

The Sultan- Kagome's Grandfather (KG/S)

Rajah- Kirara

Kagome- Sore wa himitsu desu. 

Loracarol: Now the disclaimer, with my friend: Count Z. (If you know the reference, tell me what you think it is!)

Count Z.: This is completely and utterly trivial.

Loracarol: Come one, you know that you like to help me out!

Count: Inuyasha doesn't own to Loracarol, nor does Disney's Aladdin, blah blah blah, yadda, yadda, yadda…

Loracarol: _Z!_  
Count Z.: What did I do?

Loracarol: I told you to do it nicely! (Even though it's not real…)

Count Z.: But what is reality?

Loracarol: Wha-?

Count Z.: I just said, what is reality, how do we know that we're not really in a "Matrix"-like movie, or that we're all just parts of a video game for random aliens, or-

Loracarol: Z….

Count Z.: Shutting up now…

Loracarol: Good. Would you like to say it?

Count Z.: Why not. Here it goes: On with the fanfiction! (Not show.)

Loracarol: Show off…

Loracarol: We magically zoom into the palace, Naraku emerging from his secret chambers. He slides the door shut carefully, but the princess comes storming in before he is finished. He slams it shut, pinning Kagura inside the door frame.

Sango: Naraku?

Naraku: Oh, uh, princess.

Kagura: Awk! Naraku, I'm stuck!

Naraku: Princess! How may I be of service to you?

Loracarol: Naraku spreads out his cape, hiding the door.

Sango: Oh Great and Powerful L-Sama, why can't I kill Naraku now??

Loracarol: Just deal with it. Don't worry, he gets what he deserves.

Sango: Promise?

Loracarol: Promise.

Sango: Okay. Shudder The guards just took a boy from the market- on your orders.

Naraku: Your father's charged me with keeping peace in this fair city. The boy was a criminal.

Sango: What was the crime?

Kagura: I can't breathe, Naraku!

Naraku: Why, kidnapping you, of course.

Kagura: If you could just—

Loracarol: Naraku kicks her back inside the door and it slams shut.

Kagura: --wow, that hurt!

Sango: He didn't kidnap me! I ran away!

Naraku: (Walking away as if shocked) Oh, dear! Oh, how frightfully upsetting. Had I but known.

Sango: What do you mean?

Naraku: Sadly, the boy's sentence has already been carried out.

Sango: What sentence?

Naraku: Death- by beheading.

Sango: No!

Naraku: I am exceedingly sorry, princess.

Sango: How could you?

Loracarol: Kagura finally makes it out through the door. She flies up and lands on shoulder, coughing.

Kagura: So, how did it go?

Naraku: I think she took it rather well.

Loracarol: It's time for the Magic Insta-Zoom again, so now we zoom to Sango, who is "crying" at the edge of the fountain. Kirara comes over to comfort her. Sango starts petting Kirara.

Sango: It's all my fault, Kirara. I didn't even know his name.

Loracarol: Insta-Zoom Cut to int. of dungeon. Rats scurry by, and we descend until we see Miroku chained to the wall.

Miroku: She was the princess. I don't believe it. I must have sounded so stupid to her.

Shippo: Yoo-hoo! Miroku? Hello!

Loracarol: Shippo appears at the window at the top of the dungeon.

Miroku: Shippo! Down here! Hey, c'mon--help me outta these.

Loracarol: Shippo stops, then begins chattering wildly, dropping to the ground. He wraps a cloth around his head and makes his eyes big in an imitation of the princess.

Miroku: Hey, she was in trouble. Ah, she was worth it. She was ho-ot!

Loracarol: Shippo jumps up on Miroku's shoulders and pulls a small set of tools out of his pocket, and then frees Miroku.

Shippo: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Miroku: Don't worry, Shippo. I'll never see her again. I'm a street rat, remember, and there's a law. She's gotta marry a prince, she deserves it.

Loracarol: Shippo finally frees Miroku's hands.

Shippo: Ta da!

Miroku: I'm a--I'm a fool

OLD MAN©: You're only a fool if you give up, boy.

Loracarol: We see an OLD MAN© sitting in the corner that neither Miroku nor Shippo have seen before.

Miroku: Who are you?

OLD MAN©: A lowly prisoner, like yourself. But together, perhaps we can be more.

Miroku: Treasure? I'm listening.

OLD MAN©: There is a cave, boy. A cave of wonders, filled with treasures beyond your wildest dreams. Treasure enough to impress even your princess, I'd wager.

Loracarol: The OLD MAN© turns his back, and Kagura sticks his head out of Naraku's "OLD MAN©" disguise.

Kagura: Naraku, can ya hurry it up? I'm dyin' in here!

Miroku: But the law says that only a prince can marry--

Naraku: You've heard of the golden rule, haven't you boy? Whoever has the gold makes the rules.

Miroku: So why would you share all of this wonderful treasure with me?

Naraku: I need a young man with strong legs and a strong back to go in after it.

Miroku: Ah, one problem- it's out there, we're in here?

Loracarol: Naraku walks to a wall and pushes open a hidden exit.

Naraku: Things aren't always what they seem. So, do we have a deal?

Loracarol: Miroku looks at Shippo, who shrugs his shoulders.

Shippo: Oh, hmm.

Loracarol: Insta-Zoom time again, zoom to desert scene. We see Miroku leading a horse with Naraku and Shippo on it. They end up at the cave of wonders.

THE cave: Who disturbs my slumber?

Miroku: It is I, Miroku.

THE cave: Proceed. Touch nothing but the lamp.

Loracarol: THE cave opens up with a roar, and a staircase appears in front of Miroku.

Naraku: Remember, boy--first fetch me the lamp, and then you shall have your reward.

Miroku: C'mon, Shippo.

Loracarol: Miroku begins to descend the staircase. He reaches the bottom and enters a golden chamber filled with treasure.

Miroku: Would ya look at that!

Shippo: Uh oh!

Miroku: Just a handful of this stuff would make me richer than the sultan!

Loracarol: Shippo peeks out, sees the treasure, then bolts for it.

Miroku: Shippo!

Loracarol: Shippo stops in mid run, hovering over a rug on the floor.

Miroku: Don't...touch...anything… We gotta find that lamp.

Loracarol: They begin to make their way through the room when the carpet rises off the floor and begins following them. Shippo gets the feeling they're being followed.

Shippo: Huh?

Loracarol: Shippo turns, and the carpet lies flat on the floor. He continues, and the carpet begins to follow again. Again, Shippo turns back, but the carpet is rolled up and leaning against a pile of treasure. Shippo runs to Miroku and tugs his pant leg.

Shippo: Miroku! Miroku!

Miroku: Shippo, will ya knock it off?

Loracarol: Again the carpet follows, but this time, when Shippo turns, the carpet jumps to the other side. It reaches down with a tassel and pulls Shippo's tail. When Shippo jumps around, carpet again goes to the other side. This time, Shippo lands in a karate stance. The carpet reaches down and plucks Shippo's hat off, then puts it on herself. Shippo sits thinking for a second, until carpet waves a tassel in front of his face. Shippo and carpet both jump scared, and run away. Shippo tackles Miroku and turns his head to look at the carpet.

Miroku: Shippo, what are you--crazy?

Loracarol: The carpet peeks out from behind a pile of treasure.

Miroku: A magic carpet! C'mon. C'mon out. I'm not gonna hurt you.

Loracarol: The carpet slowly comes out, shyly, then picks up Shippo's hat and dusts it off. It flies over to Miroku and hands the hat to Shippo, who's hiding next to him. Shippo screeches, and jumps onto Miroku's shoulder.

Miroku: Take it easy, Shippo. It's not gonna bite.

Loracarol: The carpet again picks up Shippo's hat and hands it to him. Shippo shakes his fist and screeches at it. The carpet begins to walk away, looking sad.

Miroku: Hey, wait a minute. Don't go. Maybe you can help us.

Loracarol: The carpet looks back, excited. It then flies over and wraps around the pair.) Miroku: Hey, whoa! You see, we're trying to find this lamp.

Loracarol: The carpet motions for them to follow it.

Miroku: I think it knows where it is.

Loracarol: They pass through a long cave, until they emerge in a giant underground cavern. In the centre of the room is a tall pillar, with a staircase going up to it. It is surrounded by water with unevenly placed stones forming a bridge. At the top of pillar is a beam of light. It's kind of creepy looking. Miroku begins to cross the bridge.

Miroku: Shippo, wait here.

Shippo: Oh. Huh?

Loracarol: Shippo sees a shrine with a golden monkey. The outstretched paws hold a ruby. Shippo is hypnotically drawn to it, like in all movies. Miroku climbs the stairs quickly. The carpet sees Shippo and grabs his tail trying in vain to hold him back. Miroku finally reaches the magic lamp.

Miroku: This is it? This is what we came all the way down here to--

Loracarol: Shippo breaks free of the carpet's hold and lunge toward the jewel.

Miroku: Shippo- NO!

Loracarol: Shippo grabs the jewel. There is a rumbling and the room begins to shake.

THE cave: Baka no hito!

Shippo: Um…. Oops?

THE cave: You have touched the forbidden treasure!

Loracarol: Shippo places the jewel back into the paw, but the jewel and the shrine melt into lava.

THE cave: Now you will never again see the light of day!

Loracarol: Miroku races down the steps, but they flatten into a ramp, and he skies down until he flies into the air. The water has turned into lava. He is falling toward it, when all of a sudden the carpet appears and catches him. Shippo is standing on one of the rocks of the bridge. He looks left and right and sees rocks exploding into lava. Then the carpet races over and Miroku grabs him, just as the last rock is exploding.

Miroku: Holy crap! Carpet, let's move!

Loracarol: Together, they race back through the caves dodging walls and falling debris. Shippo grabs Miroku's head and covers his eyes.

Miroku: Shippo, this is no time to panic!

Loracarol: He pulls Shippo off his head and sees they are flying into a wall.

Miroku: Start panicking!!!

Loracarol: The carpet goes into a dive, then through another cave. Finally, they emerge through the internal entrance. Outside, the cave begins to growl and close. The carpet and company are almost to the top when a boulder drops on carpet, sending it to the floor. Miroku grabs onto the rock wall and holds on. He sees the OLD MAN© (who's really Naraku,) at the top, within reach.

Miroku: Help me out!

Naraku: Throw me the lamp!

Miroku: I can't hold on. Give me your hand.

Naraku: First give me the lamp!

Loracarol: Miroku reaches in and pulls out the magic lamp. He hands it up, and Naraku raises it above his head.

Naraku: Ha ha ha ha! Yes! At last! Ha ha ha ha!

Loracarol: Miroku has climbed out with the assistance of Shippo, but Naraku kicks aside Shippo and grabs Miroku's wrist.

Miroku: What are you doing?

Naraku: Giving you your reward- your eternal reward.

Loracarol: Naraku pulls out a crooked dagger and is about to stab Miroku, when Shippo bites him on the wrist. He screams, but lets go of Miroku, who falls into the cave. Naraku throws Shippo into the cave as well. Miroku and Shippo fall, but the carpet catches them. Aladdin manages to hang on, but he has already hit the wall several times, and becomes unconscious. On the surface, the cave roars one final time, than sinks back into the sand. Naraku pulls off his disguise. (Yeah, like he was really fooling anyone…)

Naraku: Heh heh heh! It's mine. It's all mine! ---where is it? No. NO!!


	9. The Genie

Loracarol: I got some Fruits basket characters to come, and do the disclaimer this time, and made sure to get the cutest ones that I know of. I ended up being able to get Kyo, Kisa, and Momiji! Yeah!

Kyo: Hey- you said you got the cute ones, so WHY THE H AM I HERE????

Momiji: Kyo really is an idiot…

Kisa: Well, as long as he doesn't hurt Tohru nee-chan, I don't care.

Loracarol: Oh! Kisa you're so cuuuute!!

Kyo: …

Momiji: Anyway, here's the official disclaimer:

Momiji and Kisa: Lady L. doesn't own Inuyasha, who belongs to Rumiko Takahashi, Disney's version of "Aladdin" which belongs to Disney,

Kyo: No fricken' duh…

Momiji and Kisa: Or any of us, though she does wish that she owned Kisa-

Hiro: Over my dead body!

Loracarol: Because Kisa's so cuuuute!

Kyo: For the love of- Just go on with the story already….

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

Loracarol: Magic Swirl to Sango's bedroom. She is sitting on her bed, next to Kirara who looks sad. KG/S walks in.

KG/S: Oh, spirits of the sky! Spot her tears from falling!

Sango: …?

KG/S: it's a play on what I said in the first movie.

Sango: …

KG/S: ….?

Sango: ……..?

KG/S: ANYWAY, WHAT'S WRONG!

Sango: Why are you yelling?

KG/S: It appears the authoress had the "Caps Lock" key stuck on.

Sango: Oh.

KG/S: Your _line_.

Sango: Oh. Yeah. Naraku...has...done something... terrible…

KG/S: There, there, there, my child--we'll set it right. Now, tell me everything.

Loracarol: It's magical swirly time! Swirl to the cave, and we discover Miroku lies unconscious on the carpet. Shippo tries valiantly to wake him up.

Shippo: …

Loracarol: I _said_ Shippo tries _valiantly_ to wake him up.

Shippo: …

Loracarol: Or else…

Shippo: Yes ma'am! Trying to valiantly wake him up now ma'am! Oh, oh. Miroku? Wake up Miroku.

Miroku: But Sango, it's _my_ turn to massage _your_ back…

Shippo: Sango in what Kagome called a "bikini!"

Miroku: What- where?

Shippo: …

Miroku: That wasn't very nice Shippo.

Loracarol: Carpet rises up, lifting Miroku up.

Miroku: Oh, my head, we're trapped. That two faced son-of-a-baboon! Whoever he was, he's long gone with that lamp.

Shippo: Aha!

Loracarol: Shippo pulls out the MAGIC LAMP.

Miroku: Why, you hairy little thief! Looks like such a beat-up, worthless piece of junk. Hey, I think there's something written here, but it's hard to make out.

Loracarol: We _all_ know what happens next… He rubs the LAMP and "suddenly " smoke comes out of the hole, the LAMP begins to shake and glow, but Miroku holds onto the LAMP, and our wonderful friend, Inuyasha comes out, looking _extremely _annoyed.

Inuyasha: Jeez! You cannot keep your hands to yourself! You just _had_ to rub the _stupid_ lamp and wake _me_ up! He hangs Miroku on a nearby rock. Does it feel good to be outta there!? No! I'd rather be sleeping instead having an inconsiderate…What's your name anyway?

Miroku: Uh, Miroku.

Inuyasha: Miroku? Hello, Miroku. Not nice to have you on the show. Can we call you 'Mir?' Or maybe just 'Oku?' Or how 'bout 'pervy?'

Miroku: I must have hit my head harder than I thought.

Inuyasha: Yes! You hit your head! You never saw me! Say, you're a lot quieter

Then my last master, either that, or I've gotten louder. Heaven forbid…

Miroku: Wait a minute! I'm--your master?

Inuyasha: Crap. That's right! He can learn! What would you wish of me, the ever grumpy, the long contained, often imitated, but never duplicated--

Genie! Of! The Lamp! Right here direct from the lamp, right here for your enjoyment and wish fulfillment. Thank youuuuu! I am so glad I got that over with.

Miroku: Whoa! Wish fulfillment?

Inuyasha: Three wishes to be exact, and ix-nay on the wishing for more wishes. That's it—three Uno, dos, tres. No substitutions, exchanges or refunds.

Miroku: Now I know I'm dreaming.

Inuyasha: I am _not_ singing.

Loracarol: Don't worry, I got Gai from "Naruto" to do all the singing for you.

Inuyasha: NevermindI'llsing.

Miroku: He's _that_ bad?

Inuyasha: Watching him sing is an experience akin to watching Naraku become a geisha who entertains Sesshomaru who has dyed everything of his- including his hair and fluffy thing hot pink-

Miroku: Good God. It's _that_ bad.

Inuyasha: No. It's worse. Well I guess I'll sing the stupid song.

Miroku, I don't think you quite realize what you've got here! So why don't you just sit down and shut up, whilst I illuminate the possibilities.

_Well Naraku had them children of his_

_Sesshomaru had a fluffy tail_

_But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeve_

_You got a brand of magic never fails!_

_You got some power in your corner now_

_Some heavy ammunition in your camp_

_You got some punch, pizzazz, yahoo and how_

_See all you gotta do is rub that lamp_

_And I'll say_

_Mister Miroku sir_

_What do you want from me?_

_Let me take your order, jot it down_

_You ain't never had a friend like me_

_No no no!_

_Life is your restaurant_

_And I'm your maitre' d!_

_C'mon whisper what it is you want_

_You ain't never known anyone like me._

_Yes sir, we pride ourselves on service_

_You're the boss, the king, the shah!_

_Say what you wish, it's yours! True dish_

_How about a little ba-da-ba?_

_Try some of column 'A'_

_Try all of column 'B'_

_I'm in the mood to help you dude_

_You ain't never known anyone like me_

_Can anyone do this?_

_Does anyone do that?_

_Does anyone pull this out their little hat?_

_Can your friends go poof!_

_Well looky here_

_Can your friends go Abracadabra, let 'er rip_

_And then make the sucker disappear?_

_So don't you sit there slack jawed, buggy eyed_

_I'm here to answer all your midday prayers!_

_You got me bona fide, certified,_

_You got a genie for a charg? d'affairs!_

_I got to help you out_

_So what you wish I really want to know_

_You got a wish that's three miles long, no doubt_

_So all you gotta do is rub like so, and oh!_

_Mister Miroku, sir, have a wish or two or three_

_I'm on the job, you big nabob_

_You aint' never known anyone, ever known anyone_

_You aint' never known anyone, ever known anyone_

_You ain't never...known...anyone... like...me!_

_You ain't never known anyone like me!_

Inuyasha: So what'll it be, master?

Miroku: You're gonna grant me any three wishes I want?

Inuyasha: Ah, almost. There are a few provisos, a couple of quid pro quos

Miroku: Like?

Inuyasha: Ah, rule number one: I can't kill anybody. So don't ask. Rule two: I can't make anyone fall in love with anyone else. Rule three: I can't bring people back from the dead. It's not a pretty picture, other than that, you got it!

Miroku: I can wish for _anything_ else?

Inuyasha: Well, no, only anything else that advances the plot line. Also, I have promised Kagome that I wouldn't grant any wishes if they were perverted.

Miroku: Dangit. How did you get to be the genie anyway?

Inuyasha: I was dating a miko named Kikyo, dumped Kikyo, started dating Kagome, Kikyo cursed us both, and poof I was a genie. I don't even _know_ where Kagome is. Plus the authoress decided that I would be the genie, and you don't argue with the authoress.

Miroku: You're afraid of the authoress? Some all-powerful genie-- I don't know, Abu--he probably can't even get us out of this cave. Looks like we're gonna have to find a way out of here--

Loracarol: They start to leave, but Inuyasha steps in front of them.

Inuyasha: Excuse me? Are you lookin' at me? Did you rub my lamp? Did you wake me up, did you bring me here? And all of a sudden, you're walkin' out on me? I don't think so, not right now. You're gettin' your wishes, so siddown!

Loracarol: They all sit on the carpet.

Inuyasha: In case of emergency, jump off the da carpet, I don't care where, keep your hands and arms inside the carpet unless you'd like something bad to happen, and weeee'rrrrrreee...outta here!

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What do you think? Horrible? Okay? Please Review!


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